Where the Sane Should Fear to Tread

Therapy Sessions on File


Tuesday, March 29, 2005
Power trip, control, 'bend to my will'... words/phrases to describe Voss. Okay, this character is seriously pissing me off. The initial reasonings/explanations I could, and did, buy. But this has become personal. It is not good business practice to get, or be, 'personal'. Someone is going down - hard - and it won't be House. Next week is, of course, a repeat (assholes!). Final note... I've got a scrummy little crush happening not only on Hugh Laurie (well duh! Ever since BlackAdder days for that one) but also Robert Sean Leonard. Yumyumyum!

Started looking at flights for the wedding in July. Ballpark, fifteen to sixteen hundred for the two of us. Shit and fuck. So much for doing any work around the house this year. I'd like to use that money on the deck, since it probably won't make it through another winter without leaking, but there's really no option. Fuck.

Tentatively identified a series of files FindIt says are trojans. Um... no, don't think so, not after digging/reading some more. Most likely they are part of TrendMicro's online scanner, especially since no scanner and two trojan nukers did not identify these files at all. Secureservicepack continues to stump me, but I think I'm one step closer to figuring out what it's for. For all the good that does *blows raspberry*.

I need meds, lots of them, in higher dosages. Actually, I want to be drugged to just this side of functional. I'm two steps away from grabbing the gun, a box of ammo, walking out the door and going completely postal. And yes, I'm fucking serious. I've had enough, don't want to deal with shit anymore and utterly despise people in general. So drug me or kill me, I really don't give a flying fuck which one anymore.

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Monday, March 28, 2005
I can run scans in my sleep. I'm starting to actually know what all the crap in an HJT log means and I can understand the FindIt logs.

Panda picked up something new, but none of the other scanners saw it (or the others Panda found). Deleted entries from ZA to see if they, or something new, tries for access again. Rundll32 has been (*waves the chicken*) silent and nothing has popped-up at all. And I feel like I'm armed for war. Blockers, watchers, scanners... sheesh.

While MN is working, it may still 'have something'. Sweet. And I'm still trying to identify secureservicepack. I just don't like the looks of it (size, file type, date) but I'm hesitant to delete it in case it is something real (and vital). Deep digging is needed and maybe a call/e-mail to an old friend.

On a personal note... if I had the means, I'd do it. I'm fed up and just don't care any more. So there.

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Saturday, March 26, 2005 at 1041pm
There shouldn't be two Apollo's on board BSG and, in reality, there aren't. But Richard Hatch, in some enduring way, will always be Apollo to me (and forever the subject of many lustful fantasies, even in my old age), even if his character is NOT Apollo. Slightly disappointing, but I'm enjoying the bastard character RH is portraying. This new character is the total opposite to the old Apollo - good vs evil, goody-two-shoes vs nasty-bastard... I'd make slurpy sounds, but that would be too obvious.

So, having exhausted NCIS fic for the moment ("Gibbs would so not say/do that, you dimbulb!" - this means you've run out of readable material), it's time to look for BSG fics. Adama/Tigh does NOT do it for me... nope, just can't see those two characters doing the nasty. Lee and Kara... ya, that sounds good.

And a small note to self - episode and character guides, you fucking dipshit. Sheesh, mental notes just do not work anymore.

Two more files gone *crosses fingers* and more clean-up done. It's looking like I have a new variant of a trojan downloader - three of four files can be identified, but the fourth can't. Veeery interesting. Locked down MN as tight as I can and still have Net access. Hopefully, I can either catch the shit before it comes in or be more aware when something new gets pushed onto MN. I'd like to personally castrate the makers of crap!ware... with a dull knife... and a bottle of vinegar in the other hand.

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Friday, March 25, 2005 at 1058pm
"There's a light..." Gods, this song is just echoing through my head. From a musical staring Tim Curry. Shouldn't need any more hints than that.

Ya know, I get the impression using just one AV program is a waste of time. Panda found seventeen, Housecall found zero, McAfee found one, AVG found zero. Wha? There still might be a trojan on MN, but the Trojan buster I have said the system is clean... yet FindIt continues to 'find' something. Oh, and where I had one section down to one stubborn file, there's now two files. *beats head on desk*

On the bright side - *laughs self stupid* - I'm learning a lot of probably useless stuff. All this virus/trojan stuff is fascinating and so are all the little utility programs to clean shit up. Seriously, I'm actually having fun with this. It helps that I'm not worried about accidentally doing damage. Things are saved/backed-up so what have I got to lose? It would be faster (maybe easier) to say to hell with all this and simply nuke-and-pave but, dammit!, this has become personal. Yes, I'm well aware I do need serious help, thank you very much.

I'm obsessed with Gibbs/DiNozzo. Ya, a chunk of the writers can't 'do' Gibbs' character (I've seen OOC, but some these... wow) but most of them are far better than the Gibbs/Todd writers. Maybe I haven't found the 'good' Gibbs/Todd stories/writers, but the more-than-a-few I've tried to read have one, or both, characters so far out-of-character it's impossible to finish the story. *sigh* Not much else to do but read while all the scans are running.

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Sunday, March 20, 2005 at 1121pm
What I have been up to all weekend? Trying very hard not to take a sledge hammer to the MN computer. Why? It's so infected with crap!ware it's not funny. It started with an update to Zone Alarm (again!) but, after much digging, I don't think ZA is the problem. Some of the problems appear to be deep-rooted and for the life of me I cannot figure out how this happened. I run scans - AV, adware, spyware, all that crap - and none have picked up on some of the stuff I'm finding. It's so bad I've hit a forum and begged for help. I really don't hold out much hope for fixing MN, and I've transfered everything I really want off (and scanned the shit out of it!). Even hacked at the registry a bit and found some interesting stuff. Didn't know there was a website called 'dietpussy.com'. Hey, learn something new every day... even if I didn't want to.

When, or rather IF, MN comes back, I've gathered tools galore. Seriously looking at a pay AV put out by Panda Software since their online scan found most of the deeply buried shit.

A final note to the wonderful member on GeeksToGo who goes by the nick 'thatman' - Thank you! Your assistance is most appreciated.

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Thursday, March 17, 2005
Happy St. Patrick's Day!!

Apparently I am cold and rude on the phone. Do I care? No. At home, I don't have to be nice or pleasant or chatty on the phone (unless I want to). The only reason I answered the phone, while I was in the middle of doing something else, is I thought the caller might be MiL or SiL. You, however, weren't either of those people so I was busy AND annoyed. And calling SiL to bitch about it is just childish and lame... which doesn't surprise me, given what I remember of you (which isn't much, or very flattering).

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Saturday, March 12 2005 at 1047pm
My eyes are crossed and my brain fried. Been trying to figure out how to punch a hole in the router so I can use an FTP Server (yes, server, not client). I know what I'm doing (more or less), I've opened the ports (from what I can tell) and I've noted more IP numbers than I probably should have. The problem has got to be the firewall/router. A firmware upgrade may help, but I must hear back from Trafalga before doing it. Well, that and build up a shit-load of courage.

Christ-on-a-fucking-broom! Wildefyre - really, she should change her handle to Wankefyre and just be done with it - is at it again. Seriously, is this person really over the age of thirty? My niece, who is fourteen, is more mature that this idjit. Ya know, at first I didn't mind her work, but now (even if I could stand reading it) I'd drop this wanky, sobbing, lying, drama-queen in a hot second. The fandom has enough babies, pity a supposed adult has to add to the collection.

Last month, FiL decided he'd use the new Shaw Secure (on the 'advise' of a Shaw tech). So he dumped Norton and went with this unknown, unproven package thingy. MrFixIt had a bird (rightly so!) and I prayed to the computer gods when I found out. See, this Secure thing is supposed to 'stop everything such as viruses, etc, before they get to your computer'. And a Shaw tech, whose job it is to get customers to use the service, is more knowledgeable and understands FiL's problems better than MrFixIt. Oh please. Both of us, MrFixIt and me, were waiting for a 'I'm infected!' call. And it came. The program found a trojan on the 'puter and said program couldn't fix/remove the issue. FiL called MrFixIt. MrFixIt said - "I can't help you, call Shaw." Atta Boy!!!

On this day, seventeen years ago, hubby and hitched our wagons together. Poor boy had no idea what he was getting into... neither did I.

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Wednesday March 9, 2005 at 329pm
*scans archives and lists* Why do I have a feeling I'm not going to get much actual work done today?

Six hours later Good thing the day was pretty dead anyway...

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Tuesday, March 8, 2005 at 830pm
*spews coffee on monitor* Oh dear supreme beings! Go, run! Read this NOW! (just stow all liquids first).

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Sunday, March 6, 2005 at 945pm
Ya know what's interesting? As I jump shows I encounter the same writers. Noted this before in TV and anime. There's three, so far, from Firefly who also write NCIS. Hrm...

There is a floor in my 'puter room. And a table underneath BU and the scanner. And I made ten dollars returning all the empty juice boxes... which I promptly blew at Starbucks tonight.

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Saturday, March 5, 2005 at 1058pm
For a pairing to work, canon or not, the writing has to be more than passable. For unconventional pairings (ya, that covers almost all TV-slash pairings), the writing has be good and a plot has to be present. For me, first encounters can make or break pairings. Thank the gods I've, more-or-less, hit it lucky so far.

Too many groups, too many communities. Do I really need to subscribe to *counts* eleven QaF groups? (a short time later...) Right, dumped fifteen groups, signed up for four. *sigh*

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Friday, March 4, 2005 at 1102pm
Meh. What can I say? Something piques my curiosity, interest, and I obsess over it.

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Wednesday, March 2, 2005 at 819pm
I had a dream. The dream said "read Josh/Donna smut!" Always obey your dreams.

*drools* New House community - House_Slash. *runs away to read*

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Tuesday, March 1, 2005 at 1008pm
Once in a while, useful links spring on to my screen. Interesting article, good pointers for both writers and reviewers.

A quick foray to The Pit revealed there is now a House MD section. I weep for the show, the actors/creators and the entire fandom.

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