Where the Sane Should Fear to Tread

Therapy Sessions on File


04/30/03 at 941pm
I'm not supposed to be on here, on the 'puter. So much for best intentions.

Must say, I am bloody impressed with Matthew Perry (Chandler from Friends) on the West Wing. Wow. Really haven't seen him in a more dramatic role before. Yes, there is humor, but not the slapstick shit found on Friends. Whoops, back on again...
04/30/03 at 848pm
'Tis one of those days where I could ramble on and on for pages, and it would all be about nothing in particular. Feeling chatty? Maybe. I dunno.

Registered for the new Pharmacare program, and just in time from the sounds of things. Forget the phone option - always busy, impossible to get through. The online option appears to be overwhelmed - slow doesn't even come close as a description, though I suspect time of day may play a roll here.

Also got the taxes whipped up and bills paid. Chequing account did not appreciate the latter. I have, effectively, three more pay cheques coming before maternity leave. Those have to pay for the house insurance (end of May) and car insurance. That last one is going to be fun, probably in the eighteen-hundred dollar range, and where the fuck am I supposed to get that kind of money? Mortgage, car payments, insurance, hydro, phone... dammit. Oh, and let's not forget replacing the front door... which is going no where fast. Note to self - start calling other home reno companies Monday.

Three days to the party, and my house is... the big clutter is gone, just the little, easy stuff left. Except for my computer room and hubby's. Hubby's I won't touch unless I'm truly suicidal and mine is an intensive two day project. Attempted to find some insurance documentation last night but gave up after forty-five minutes. I know it's here, somewhere... pick a pile, any pile. Yeah, must start digging this room out before the baby arrives.

Going back through my QAF links and by-passed fics looking for new/unread stuff. Found a few fics I kept saying I'd get back to but never did. And some I'm just desperate enough to read. I can hear the obsession train chugging down the damn track.

Oh! QAF related... Hal Sparks was on Celebrity Jepoardy Monday. He was a scream, and nice to see he does have a brain and is so not like his character on the show. Michael Novotney is a whining sack of shit and Hal is nothing like that... at least from what I've seen in a couple of interviews and on CJ. Damn! Interviews! I could have sworn I had a dig copy of one of his interviews. 'Puter gremlins ate if I did. And I don't think it was burnt off no QAF interviews are showing on the burn list.

Debating how much to do around the office next week. Month end data needs entering and there's some letters to run up, but if I do it then the gal I'm training doesn't get the practice. And, really, she needs to start learning how to do more than one thing at a time. So what the hell do I do next week? Maybe I should take a day or two off. And do what? Won't have a car, can't walk more than three blocks without a bathroom stop and sitting around the house is just as bad (if not worse) than sitting around the office. It just occurred to me what I can do with the extra time; find replacement links for fics on MM.O. There's been nothing posted, that I can see, but I'd place bets on it going bye-bye. This should be at least a two day job (yay?).

Going to try something new with this and the LJ starting tonight. I refuse to give up entries here, especially since I have more 'creative' control on my own damn site, but... *shrugs* keep feeling like I should be using the LJ more than I am. Use it like it's meant to be used. Now that sounds fucked.

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04/27/03 at 256pm-813pm
I was going to get up, but... Did get up for bit, long enough to grocery shop and do some laundry. But that's it. Feeling lazy, probably because I'm still not walking right.

Broke down and delurked on an ML. Regrets? Yes, of course. Do I care? Nope. And I did make sure I was polite - I despise responders who feel they have to swear and resort to name-calling. If someone decides to flame me because of it, well, I've been wanting to try out the spam filters on that e-mail account.

Hubby decided to redecorate the deck. Gone are my pots of dead plants, gone is my toilet. Yes, you read that right - a toilet. It was to make into a planter, but I never quite got around to it. Nevertheless, I liked my deck toilet. It had style, invoked thought... convinced family members I should be committed. Have to look for it later. Didn't hear any smashing going on, so it's probably sitting in the garage. I hope.

Media Miner is seriously pissing me off. It's been acting pathetic for close to two weeks now. Is it temporary? Permanent? What? Nothing in the forums about the cause, or solution, except some jag-off spouting off about users donating. Ya, well if y'all offered some other way than Paypal, I might. That service is a fucking rip-off for non-US bank account persons. *sticks up middle finger* Service charge that, asshole. And give people a fucking straight answer while you're at it.

Jezzu!!! Just found the most fucking awesome QAF site. Episode guides, vids, wallpaper, character bios... *swoons* Pardon me while I praise the webmistress/master and 'borrow' some stuff.

I would seriously like to see more of Peter Paige (Emmett). I've seen/read a couple interviews with him, and he's so damn interesting. Truth be told, I'd like to see most of the actors in QAF in different roles, working with different people. There's something about the vast majority of the cast that just... captures me. And it has nothing to do with their QAF roles. Must remember to go on a hunt for this.

Okay, I'm all over the map tonight. Cruising NBC - looking for Gale Harold's guest spot on one of the L&O spin-offs - when I remember (gasp!) to check the ER section. If the episode I taped was a repeat, there's no sense breaking my leg to get it watched. The show has been on the air for nine seasons, NINE! OMG, is that right? Holy shit. I'm afraid to go looking for anything else now.

And one last thing... QAF has aired in the East, why aren't there any posts about it yet?! Goddammit! I wanna know how the B/J reunion went? Did anyone have to crawl, beg? Who kissed who first? Was the sex better than the first time after the bashing in season two? COME ON!! I'M STARVING HERE!

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04/27/03 at 120pm
ATP finally updated. Hallelujah!

Gotta remember to watch the tape in the VCR. Taped a couple shows last week - ER was one, what were the others? - and I need the tape again this week. Really must go throught the tape cupboard and find another blank one.

Popped to the Frog's LJ. She's been finding, and playing, with new quiz things. *roll eyes* Like I can resist them.

Which Gravitation Character Are You?
Created by the Twisted-World
What shounen-ai 'ship' from Gensomaden
Saiyuki season one are you?

brought to you by Quizilla

Frog's results don't surprise me one bit, nor do mine. *snort* gotta take the Yaoi quiz in a bit too. Betcha I get the same result.

Feel the urge to do some serious site work. But what site? WK may be a bit ignored (I promise to rememdy that, really) but I like it's design, and Wanderings has hit a severe lack of interest phase, GRP is due for updates (oh god, no! not already! Spare me!!!) so just GW is left. Facelift? Redesign? Either of those options are a lot of work, but it would give me a chance to flex some CSS creativity. Yeah, maybe that's what I'll work on next.

And I'm just too damn lazy to use the LJ right now. Bite me.
04/26/03 at 938pm
Pain, stiffness, more pain. The deck is clean, but I'm paying the price. Thing is, it's not like it took a lot movement or lifting/moving anything heavy. Just nearly five hours on my feet. With an already partially outta wack pelvis joint. Smart... NOT.

Stumbled across some B/J fan vids. Yum, drool, pant, gasp... get the picture. Fuck me, those two are hot together. Picked up some wonderful music vids and some key scenes from season 3. I cannot stay away from spoilers.

I really should get up and investigate the digging sounds outside. It's nearly ten o'clock and someone is digging? *snort* With my luck, someone finally did decide to bury a body in our 'body pit'. Okay, on the count of three, stand up. Right, tell that to my hips and pelvis; they just told the rest of me to fuck the hell off.

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04/26/03 at 834am
Hubby is off doing a dangerous goods course, the weather is showing potential for decency, and the kitchen is semi-straightened. I may get to power-wash the deck yet today.

Drove around for an hour last night trying to find a pub or bar with a) seating b) food we'd eat. Start of round two (hockey) and there wasn't a seat to be had in our regular place - and we were there two-and-a-half hours early! Ended up watching/eating at home.

Boss-man is gone for two weeks, and the other lab tech will be leaving Wednesday for a week-and-a-half. This sucks. There's not much I can do, except answer the phone, since I've already submitted 'leave of absence' paperwork for the insurance coverage. No insurance, no work on patients. Better dig up some books... maybe I can actually get some writing done... or more of the blanket made. Hrm.

Party-day draws nearer, and the anxiety level goes up. Have we heard from everyone? Do we have all the extras thought of/accounted for? Where's the damn punch bowl? Chairs! Sis is picking up stuff parents on Sunday, dropping it off here I think since Dad isn't here as frequently as he's as sis's. There's some build-up of clutter around this house - it's the way hubby and I are - but I should be able to whip it up in no time.

Talked to Sis about the hospital room. Ouch on the price, but she seems to think it would be worth it. If I end up with a C-section, three days without at least the TV to watch will suck. The baby won't be awake that much, and I won't be able to do much distance walking. Take the TV. And god knows what I'd end up with beside me in a semi-private. This goes along with what patients have told me of their/their kids stay in maternity wards. Inconsiderate visitors, family that does everything short of moving in, and on and on. Ya, take the private room. Hubby is supposed to be looking into our EH coverage to see if any of the cost is covered.

Finally got the German Cat on Y!Messenger. Catching up on all the news we just can't cram in an e-mail (and besides, it's not the same). Hard to believe it's coming up on two years since she moved. Damn, where has the time gone. Health-wise, she's still the shits and her son is still an asshole. Oh, and her sis-in-law is fucking nuts.

Not much new news on our common interest - Da Man - but she did have a couple new tid-bits. None of them interesting or surprising. Da Man is starting to sound whiney and pathetic.

And speaking of Da Man, I haven't heard from the guy I'm supposed to be working on that project with. Last thing he said was he'd get some pictures and stuff up to me. That was when, mid-March? Hello! Due date approaching! Need to get to work on the site you moron. Unorganized, non-communicative, lazy... could probably add more to that list. Idiot.

Time to go check on the weather, prep the deck, etc.

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04/20/03 at 319pm
Need to do something about ventilation in the bathroom. Strange new life forms are starting to grow on the walls.

Must find little kitty-sized butt plugs. No, not looking for kinky sex with my cat (gross!), rather something I can shove in the bastard so he can't pee on my stuff. It's not a regular habit of his, only seems to happen when I cheese him off. How does one cheese-off a cat? By not letting him out (at three in the morning), by not giving him treats (when he demands them), by not petting him when pats are requested (never mind that you're asleep or otherwise engaged), by just breathing in and out.

Little piss-filled-bastard got the microwave door this morning. Just hopped on the counter - so he could watch the fish I thought - waltzed to the microwave and lifted his tail. He stared right at me as he painted the door yellow. Cats with attitude, fuck how I love 'em. KILL!

I am, without a doubt, the worst housekeeper around. It took three passes to get the kitchen floor clean - ew! Spot wipes are not good enough; the whole damn thing needs to be mopped down with far greater frequency.

And, of course, my damn back is killing me now. Weather finally improved to the point where I'd consider power-washing the deck, but the ol' body says "get bent, moron". Maybe next week. *sigh*

Went to my parents for dinner last night. Mom kept wanting to know when the baby moved around so she could feel it. It's a baby, not a circus animal; it doesn't perform tricks on command. Babe stayed quiet and relatively inactive the whole time... until we got home. Then, you'd think the kid was running a marathon or something. Sheesh.

Think mom was upset I'm not getting off feeling the baby move. Ya, it's neat but if I think about it too much, I freak out. Sorry, but there's a small creature inside my body and it's moving around. How do I know, for sure, it's a baby? It could be some giant parasitic thing, ala Alien and the sequels. It gives me the creeps some days.

Found out why mom's been so slow with getting pictures to sis and I. One word - Dad. He's never out of the house long enough for her to go through things. And if she tries to look for items while he's there, he hovers around her. Just to make sure nothing gets tossed (that's where I'll place my bet) since she has done that in the past. Sis and I may have to tear certain areas of the house apart while our folks are out of town.

Sat down yesterday to watch last week's QAF episode and found the tape stopped before the show ended. Fuckfuckfuckfuck!!!!! Easy enough to find out what happened, but that's not the damn point! No more going to bed, that's it. I'll nap earlier in the evening if I have to, but I am not relying on the VCR again! To top it off, there's been a real run on Michael/Brian fics over on the ATP. Gross *pours soap in eyes, scrubs* - ew ew ew! Little bastard soooo does not deserve Brian, especially after what I did see of the last two episodes. Death to Mikey!! May Brian fuck only Justin until both their cocks fall off (from over use)!!

*reads last paragraph* Um... yeah. Think I'll go have a reality check now, and maybe cut down on the sugar a bit...

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04/18/03 at 157pm
Gods, do designers look at the combinations of background/text color they use? Light text on a light background is so easy to read... NOT. As if my eyes weren't fucked up enough. Or neon colored backgrounds (my eyes! I'm blind!). Had to pass up a number of fics today because they made my eyes water. Pity, 'cause some looked good.

Just running through links, filling a grave yard with the dead. Seriously looking like most Gravitation sites have died, same with the Kizuna and Greenwood ones. *sigh*

Trafalga is hauling the main server off-line again. Something is serioulsy wonked with that thing. He calls this part of the learning process. *snort* And he wonders why I won't let him touch/upgrade my machines.

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04/18/03 at 158pm
I was going to hunt some more fics to read over lunch, but a little flame war just totally caught my attention. The whiner I've talked about previously, and her/his obvious detractors have seen fit to pollute ML's with a flame war. Ya wanna critisize someone and their work, take it the fuck OFF the list(s). Christ, where are the fucking brains of these people?

The whiner, Brian Aiden Kinney aka Becca Beans, is just that - a whiner. This post qualifies as whining. She's begging for feedback, but does not want to hear if a reader does not particularily like the way she's written one of the characters. IMO, she writes them OOC most of the time and that should be pointed out to her (-1 BAK/BB). Some readers apparently don't like Brian being friends with Ethan in one of the fics (+1 BAK/BB). Tough shit, deal with it or don't read the fic. But just because you don't get feedback - good or bad - to recent posts is no reason to post a message of this type to an entire ML. It's annoying, time consuming, and takes up mailbox space. Also brings out flamers who don't have brains to take their comments off-list...

LaMonica could have very easily responded OFF LIST, but nooooo, she had to do ON LIST. Granted, she did make valid points. However, there was absolutely no reason to subject an entire ML to her response. That did nothing but show she - LaMonica - is just as childish and immature as BAK/BB. Moreso in some parts.

BAK/BB may have started the little war, but LM is getting the majority of my low opinion. LM's own description of herself in this post, whether she meant to come across as one or not, is dead-on accurate. And the fact that "people just need to be told certain things" does not justify the post.

Both BAK/BB and LM need to grow up. And until they do, both their posts are going in my trash bin unread.

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04/18/03 at 1125am
And the whiner from the BJFic ML has left that one and moved to a different QAF list. And she's still all 'why doesn't anyone like me and my writing'. Get over it already. One person put it best... "The thing is, there will ALWAYS be detractors and harsh critics of any kind of artistic endeavor and you have to learn how to deal with it. Otherwise, you'll always be asking questions like this." Amen! Deal with it, or stop posting. Either way, stop your fucking whining!
04/18/03 at 1108am
Here I sit, at my 'puter, contemplating the things I was going to do today. Most of those things involved being outside. Someplace I'm not going when it's raining. So much for washing off the deck today. Maybe tomorrow or Sunday, if the weather improves.

Have been catching up on some fics though. Finally got around to reading Forsaken's Gravi fic which, for an AU, is pretty damn good. Seems like it's been awhile since I saw a decent Gravi fic. There used to be a fair number of Gravi fics out each week (good and bad) but lately... *shrugs* people/writers move on, tastes change.

Most of the pics came out great. Looks like there's a nice slice of Dad's life, but I wish I could find a couple pictures I remember seeing. Dad and his 'gang' in leather jackets, cigarette's hanging from the corners of their mouths. It was an absolutely priceless picture, so un-Dad-like.

Been thinking the last couple days about something my mother said a few years ago. Hubby and I, along with his brother and sis-in-law, threw his folks a fortieth anniversary party. My mom made a half-comment/half-question as to whether we'd do the same for her and my Dad's fortieth. For a couple reasons, I don't think I can. For one, I'll be days away from popping out a kid, and for a second, I don't support their marriage, don't understand why the fuck they are still together at all. They've been together for forty years only because (and this is my opinion based on what I've seen and heard) mom doesn't want to be alone and Dad's too much of a wuss to tell mom to go fuck herself. Yes, sounds harsh and there is probably more to it, but I just can't celebrate that union.

Need food, need more entertainment than this 'puter...

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04/15/03 at 706pm
I love it when my day starts off with idiots. Idiots with attitude is even better.

I bumped a woman on the train this morning. Bumped her, smiled and apologized. Instead of a pleasant response I get 'do you mind watching what you do? The other gentleman who stands here can do so without touching me and you stepped on my foot - my broken foot - the other day and never said sorry.' As I told this idiot, if I'd stepped on her foot I did not realize it and if she had said something I certainly would have apologized. What the fuck is with her attitude? I have never accidently bumped or stepped on someone and not apologized. I might have been half-asleep when the supposed incident occurred (I'm on the six-thirty am train) but if this dipwad had said at least 'ow' I think I would have caught that! Oh, and when the train stopped, this same idiot ran - yes ran up the escalator. Broken foot my ass. I have this unreasonable desire to be as annoying as possible to this dip-chick. I mean, she on fucking public transit (albeit a slightly more upscale version) what does she expect? In the twenty-plus years I have been regularily taking transit, I have never had a completely touch-free ride. Unless you've got your own personal bubble-shield, I don't think it's possible.

Hunting through vid tapes last night, for that ellusive blank one, I found a couple surprises. Galaxy Express 999 - dubbed, but it's better than nothing - and some movie from a few years ago called Aftershocks, about an earthquake in New York. Playing it now. It's pretty... well, lame. Typical disaster movie. It's not like there's anything else on Tuesday nights.

Scanned in the slides and photos we're going to use for Dad's party. Forgot we stuffed in one of me, from probably twenty-five years (at least) ago. My nephew was looking at the slides with my sis and asked her 'why does my auntie look like Harry Potter?' Dear god, I do. Click here to see the pic.

My mother had a 'thing' for dressing Sis and I alike. We didn't realize how bad it was until looking at the slides. Oh fuck me. And Sis said it was worse for her, since once she outgrew her outfit, she got mine. Life was hell for her *snicker*

And different memories, sometimes vastly different. Couple of times our memories of events were so different, we accused each other of remembering the wrong event. The nearly three years between us really makes a difference in how events were perceived. Wow.

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04/13/03 at 706pm
Old pictures, especially ones of your parents and relatives, are a scream... and a little sad. Sis and I went through a shit-load of old slides last night. We're looking for some moderately embarrassing ones of Dad for the upcoming party. Nothing really bad, just showing the progression of clothes and hair from the fifties to now. Gods, did we find some goodies. Mixed in, of course, were pictures of our Grandparents. Fuck. Those ones were great, but they hurt. Hubby has no idea how lucky he is that his Grandmother is still with us.

Anyway, gotta fire up the scanner and scan a bunch of old pics in. Slides will have to wait until I get to the office and beg boss-man to show me how to use the equipment. Once digitized, the plan is to print them out (on the really good office printer) and mount the pics on posterboards. Then we can put them up around the house, or yard if the weather is good, and everyone can look at them. Should be a scream.

Did a hospital tour thing today. So we know where to park, what to bring, etc. At every step, you could hear an invisible cash register going 'ka-ching'. Rethinking the private room option now. One-hundred-and-fifty per day, and that includes cable TV and a phone. No way to get the private room without taking those last two. Really, do I need the TV and phone? No. Anyone who needs to be called will be contacted by my sis, mom, mother-in-law, hubby. And I sure as hell don't want to have people calling me in the hospital. As for the TV... if I go into labor on a Monday you can be damn sure the VCR will be set to record QAF before I leave the house!

Upstairs fish tank got stripped again. No snails this time, but algae. A fucking gut load of algae. The new gravel and an underground filter system do not mix apparently. So bye-bye to that filter... which meant the entire tank had to be disassembled. Far easier this time since nothing had to be sterilized.

Going to try reading a fic or two without falling asleep. No guarentees on that.

Okay, if you're a fan of QAF - Brian and Justin specifically - then go read Closed Doors (link below) NOW! RUN! Fucking awesome new fic by a new writer. I really should start a rec area for QAF fics.

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04/12/03 at 326pm
I ask for something to be done, and I get 'later' or 'okay' accompanied by some attitude. I do it myself, and I get more attitude. Get the feeling I can't win? Fuck it, I just do it myself and deal with a pissed off hubby for a few hours. It's faster, and easier, in the long run. And he wonders why I don't ask for help with a lot of stuff. Big surprise.

Scanning is within one file of being complete. And I'm missing a file. Looked for it at work, nada. Checked the previously archived stuff, zippo. Checked the files I have at home, same story. Where the fuck is it?? It must be at work, buried or mis-filed... I hope.

Got one site updated today, working on another. Should refresh the main Sanctuary section too. It's been a year since that section had a face-lift... though I still have Other Wanderings to deal with, and that should take priority. Should, doesn't mean it'll get it.

Playing with the LJ. Starting to make a bit of sense, but it's still oddish. Trying out the comment on thing, seeing if I can make it work from here as well as on the LJ. Looks like it may work, but needs more testing. Really have to remember to call my host co Monday and see if I can get moved to a PHP enabled server.

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04/11/03 at 1015pm
I did it, got the LJ up and running. Lady Yaoi's journal is now live.

Wasn't easy though. I know html code, been writing and learning it for years. Good thing too, or I'd never changed some of the design elements over there.

Had week 30 check-up yesterday. Baby-face is doing fine but the little bugger is head up instead of head down. Doc is talking about 'turning' him in a couple weeks. All done externally and it does sound neat, but why? Why is it so important to have a vaginal birth? If the main reason is for the 'experience' then fuck that. Missing the birthing process will so not damage me it's not even funny. That is still the number one thing I have problems with. Suppose all women do though. I see nothing wrong with a C-section, not a damn thing.

Oh, and one fun (note the sarcasm) thing - the position is confirmed via ultrasound. There no fucking way I am drinking anything more than normal. 'Drink one 8oz glass of water one-and-a-half hours before you come in.' Come kiss my ass honey! That much, and I'll need to piss in thirty minutes tops. I'm nearly seven months pregnant, I can FEEL the fucking kid, what in the name of god do I need to have a full bladder for? Are the ultrasound machines so fucking pathetic that they couldn't see the kid at this stage? *snort* Check back in three weeks... I'll know what the scoop is by then, and whether or not I rip the techs a new one.
04/09/03 at 6:31pm - 9:37pm
Sign of the times I guess, but I really cannot stand fics crossed/meshed/fused with Harry Potter. They exist in nearly every genre I read - BLECH! Would be nice if there were some sort of anti-HP filter that could be employed.

Has someone (anyone?) taken the time to spell out what justifies what rating in written works? I had heard, at one time, the rating/classifying system used for motion pictures is not does not apply to written works. Is that true? Is there another rating system, and where is it? Admittedly, I do not know the criteria that makes a movie PG or PG-13 (I assume there is a guideline that says if nudity appears, then rate the movie thus) but I'm pretty sure it's evenly applied to all pictures because there's written guidelines. But when it comes to written works, on the 'Net is where I read the most these days, there doesn't appear to be any consistancy. What one person calls NC-17 another only calls R. When I see NC-17, I expect something harder, more graphic than I'd find in an R (or PG-13) rated fic. But that's based on my internal rating system, values and actions I consider to be classified one way or the other. And my ratings may be out of whack with the true rating system (if one exists). So, if anyone reading this knows where I can find something on classifying written works, please let me know!

Scanning is drawing to a close *dances* If I remember to bring the last batch home this weekend, I could be done before month end. Then I have the lovely task of shredding all the files. Pulled out the shredder tonight and I heard it plead for mercy. There's... a lot. Not as much as the first go round (shredders will actually overheat if run for long enough) but still a decent size pile. Yippee... not!

They were so beautiful apart, but together they were mind blowing. The contrast of dark and light played against each other so well. They were complete opposites, but when placed together there was no question that that's where they belonged.     from "The Leather Ball" by Cindy

Fuck yes! That is the best - absolutely - description I have seen for Brian and Justin. It fits so well. Both characters are fucking hot (okay, droolably fucking gorgeously hot). One blonde and pale the other sandy-haired with slightly darker skin, that when pressed together captures the eyes (and won't let go!). Their attitudes about so many things are opposite, yet they still manage to draw each other in, find common ground (not all the time) and really look/act like they belong together.

I have this incredible urge to read death-fics. I've been avoiding them (hello! Pregnancy... extra hormones... not mentally stable) but for some reason I feel like a really good cry. Maybe just some heavy angst, no death. I'll just keep adding the interesting death fics to my list for later, when I'm feeling more stable. *snort* And that will be when?

Ran as a surfer boy. Sorry, even in an AU fic I just can't wrap my head around that one. Can't put a finger on exactly what it is or why, but I can't visualize Ran as that. Ken, yes; Yoji, yes. Maybe even Omi, but Ran? *goes back to cruising fiction*

Authors who beg for feedback, and hold fics hostage for it or throw little tantrums when there is no feedback, really amuse me. There was one recently on the BJFic ML. I don't recall seeing many replies to her fics and frankly they didn't deserve the kind of feedback she wanted. All her whining accomplished, for me at least, was avoidance. That particular name appeared, and I by-passed it and the fic attached to said name. Is feedback really that important? I'll admit it's nice, but I'm not writing to get an ego boost, justify my pathetic life. If someone really needs gratification from strangers (and copious amounts for some) then they should be in serious therapy, yesterday!
04/08/03 at 7:14pm - 10:13pm
QAF finally started for us poor Canucks *drops to knees in thanks*. Spoilers and such are great if you're deprived, but nothing - NOTHING - compares to seeing the real thing. Mikey got a black eye courtesy of Brian, and the little shit (Mikey) totally deserved it. And Brian did not deserve the grief he got - and will continue to get I'll bet - from his friends/family. Pity Brian didn't hit him in the jaw requiring it to be wired shut for the rest of the season.

Sour stomach today. Chewed enough antacids to neutralize two, maybe three, people. Surprised I'm not foaming at the mouth. Wouldn't that be a pretty sight *snorts*.

Gonna do the LJ thing. Not quite sure what to use it for, but it'd be a lot easier to access from work than this section. And I wouldn't need to remember to download the new copy of this when I get home. Overwritten myself many times.

Feel in the mood for sappy fanfic. Sap mixed with smut. And maybe some angsty smut too. TxQ will take of the first, and maybe a couple BxS for the second. Haven't gone cruising for BxS for a long time... mainly because it's a bitch to find the hard-edged stuff.

*a little bit later* Right, where is the nearest dentist? Fuck, I forgot how sickly, sappy sweet some TxQ fics can be *brushes teeth for the tenth time* I really don't recommened hitting the Subtle Hints site unless you're severely sugar-deprived.

Must remember to check the GW site for the 3x4 fic below (by FS). It really is decent and I still enjoy it... more than can be said for a number of other fics.

At times, I really think I am the most brain-dead person alive. Found an old crossword book hiding in a cupboard and decided to see if I could complete any of the puzzles. Had to correct half of one before I could complete it. Some of the answers I'd put in were... stupid does not begin to cover them. *knocks on head* Hello? Anybody in there?

One more shot of antacid and then time to call this day done. With any luck, I'll have nice, vivid Brian/Justin dreams again tonight. Last night's was a doozy; a drooling, panting doozy. Dammit! I need more QAF and more fics! And I really need to know if B and J are going to end up back together or not. I don't want to wait to find out, I wanna know now! Now, now, NOW!! I suspect they are - or the writers will die horrible, pain-filled deaths - but confirmation would go a long way to easing my anxiety. *snort* Listen to me, I am mad. Lock me up and throw away the key... please.
04/06/03 at 626pm
At times, I swear I was born too late. A&E is airing an Ozzie and Hariett Nelson biography. And part of the Nelson family is... wait for it... Rick Nelson *insert fan-girl scream here* His voice does it for me, truly. God, I'd kill to see Rick in concert just to hear that voice live. Garden Party is a damn fine song. Rest in Peace Rick.

If you don't talk about something, or think about it, the problem doesn't exsist - right? Sitting on the dining room carpet last Sunday (don't ask) and noticed a couple brown spots on the ceiling near the chimney. Hubby climed up into the attic and discovered light where there should have been none. Seems the caulking around the chimney had separated on three sides. Fuck knew how long the damn thing had been leaking, but it couldn't be left. While hubby hit the local Home Creepo, I hit the roofer who redid the roof last summer. And I hit him again two days later. Would have hit him a third time - and not been as nice - if my dad hadn't said something to him this morining; they have coffee together each morning. So, the roof should be fixed... keep 'em crossed.

Found the two travel mugs I thought were lost. When we sold the Subaru last September, I assume hubby grabbed a box and emptied the car into it. I do not recall him telling me what he'd done or where the box was put. Guess what I found today. Oh. My. God. Nothing gross (thank the stars) but... so much shit. Five year old insurance papers, cassette tapes, rope, papers, mugs... yuck.

On the cleaning front, the entertainment unit (the honker) is now dust-godzilla's (too big to call bunnies) free. And all the collectible glass was washed down and sparkles. Damn, actually looks decent in the living room now. And the dining room looks so much better without the dead plants and dust. At this rate, I might actually stand a chance of having the house ready for the party.

Don't know what happened to hubby's 'puter this morning, but it refused to start-up without help. Wouldn't even start in Safe Mode. Step-by-step was the only method and not loading the mouse driver appeared to work. Why I have no fucking idea, especially since the mouse was working when Windoze finally loaded. Just to be safe, we ran a full system scan and hubby says it picked up two viruses. Loverly. For once, it's probably a good thing I'm lazy - hubby's 'puter is not open/shared and I run scans on the other 'puters fairly frequently. Needless to say, I'll be monitoring hubby's puter closely until I'm satisfied it remains clean. Or I could build him the new one I'm supposed to. Ya, would you trust a scatter-brained pregnant woman with sensative electronics? *snort*

Dinner on my own tonight 'cause hubby is at work. Ice storms back east on Friday meant no freight out here and to bring it with Monday's load would have been a nightmare. Makes for a long day, but not much choice in matter.

Mom has offered to come over and help me clean for the party. Do I take her up on that or not? Will she make 'comments' on my housekeeping, or lack thereof. I do not keep house like she does, and I never will. And I think that really bugs her. Sometimes, I'm convinced she so rarely comes over here because of my housekeeping. That should bother me, but it doesn't.

She-who-loves-frogs passed on an LJ code to me. Do I use it? Damn, I just don't know. The advantage to an LJ is the reply feature - I call it the 'instant moron' feature. It's not like anyone other than S-W-L-F would read it. Hell, she's really the only one who visits this section! That I know of at least. And, as I'm told by The-Chow-Lady (offline friend), I can be very opinionated and alienate people who don't know me (like S-W-L-F and T-C-L do) so do I really want to do an LJ? I'll mull this over for a day or two, but I'll probably end up doing it.

I could blather on more, but even I wouldn't read it. And my back is hurting sitting in this chair. Need to go find a DVD to watch and toss myself into the comfy chair. Fuck, that sounds good. Add a cup of coffee (decaf unfort.) and some fruit salad and I might not move again tonight.
04/04/03 at 735pm
ISP altered the IP so all the trackers had to be reset to exclude me. Must learn to write the damn passwords down somewhere.

Trafalga online talking about computers. I can't keep track of all his configurations. I try, really I do, but forget it. I have a general idea what parts are in what machines, but that's it. Must drive him nuts.

Hubby still asleep on the couch. Do I wake him or not? Naw, let the boy sleep.
04/03/03 at 942pm
I am ready to kill plot bunnies and muses. They're tormenting me relentlessly... again.

And as long as I'm in a killing mood, FFN is added to the mix. It's a bitch tonight with the "page not found" crap. Which did correct itself after an hour or so.

Pyro AND UC-over both had new parts *very large beaming grin* And a new 'Mikey-bashing' fic. That one just soooo hit the spot. I don't hate the character, but sometimes I just want to smash his face in. Character, not the Actor; good acting on Hal Sparks' part.

Fic-fest-y tonight since the scanning continues. Really have to start noting where I find these damn links. Random sites, obscure link areas, search engines... it's a big 'net.

Falling asleep so 'ciao'
04/01/03 at 959pm
Scanning... more scanning... Tuesday nights are pathetic on the tube, so I got much scanning done tonight. And a decent number of fics read, since the scanner is on the other 'puter.

Only mothers can talk about nothing for half-an-hour. If I do that to my child, may he hang up the phone on me! I got vivid descriptions of the fabric she bought today. Yes, it's for the baby... Yes, she's excited about the baby... I understand, really I do. And then she starts saying how she's not going to be in the delivery room with me. Yeah, you got that right mom. One of us would die, and it would not be me or the baby. Hubby will be in with me (if I'm suffering, so is he *cackles evily*) and my sis if she's around... maybe my mother-in-law if she makes it over in time. That sounds bad, saying my M-i-L can come in but my own mother can't. I'm more comfortable with hubby's mom than I am with mine.